After meeting with my supervisor, she suggested some very valid changes which she thinks I should make to the book so far. I have documented the main ones below.
Page 7/8 – To bring the background of page 7 right across to page 8 and display the text in this an alternative, more spread out way over two lines in two paragraphs.
Page 11/12 – To bring the background right across again and change the way the word ‘noise’ is displayed.
Page 13- Change Gonzo’s expression slightly.
Page 16 – Bring the wall further out, finish it.
Page 17 – Change the word devilish – could be a source of conflict in a children’s book.
Page 19/20 – Change the wording and make some changes to the spread.
The text in front of the the dark background needs revising. Consider a lighter grey.
Amy O' Reilly 